Written

Wanda gets spayed

12/20/23

This blanket was given to me

a long time ago

by my good friend

when I was in a bad place in the hospital.

Then Belly passed away on it.

It took me months to wash it.

2.5 months to be exact

Now I’m holding Wanda

Wandabelle Cook

who was just spayed

((sterilized))

and she was so afraid I’d leave her there at the clinic

I am holding my dog daughter

just like I would a human one

Just like my mother held me

Similarly to how she held me

when we left planned parenthood

When I was a teen

And needed a mother’s love

It’s these moments

(even) with my dogs

who to me

are my children

It’s within these moments

of nurturing and care

that I feel like my mother holds me forever

in the fond ways in which I remember

the ways in which will never die

because I promise to love

every living creature

as best as I can

and

when I can

just like my Mom did

my father was there

for the befores

and

the afters

of

all the stays

and most of the nows and the durings

and

he was there when

she fell off

which came in like

fall

mom would be summer one day

then you could smell autumn on her breath

she’d disappear in the winter

and come back manic in the spring

but dad was always there

and those seasons are just metaphors

but dads are underrated

the person who gave me this blanket

is also a single dad

like my dad often was

but when my mom was good, she was great

(when she was bad she was even better)

((she loved Mae West))

sometimes nurture

is all I’m made of

then nature allows me

to bend the genetic nest

12/20/23

A standup routine about dogs

1/12/24

Regularly scheduled dog content:

• Wanda caught her first ball!!

• Wanda taught Westley that they both can dig in the yard, and roll in mud and fml!

• Westley has chilled out even more so, comparatively speaking, and aids in scolding Wanda, which is hilarious. What a mamas boy.

• Why do I even put anything at all in dogs reach?

• If Wanda and Westley could take off their harnesses, they’d throw them across the room like I do with my bra

• Wanda likes her kennel and voluntarily gets in it after she destroys something

• I knew this was gonna be a lot of work, and here I am going crazy over trying to have a clean house and mind all while having explosive adhd like a temu ad pop up all while making sure everything everywhere is out of dog’s reach

• My dogs are collectively my weight, so I don’t understand how I can walk them both like I did today.

• Trashbags are just piñatas for dogs

• Westley has his “favorite” plushy type of toys, and even though he wants to destroy everything else, he’d always just played with and cuddled or thrown them, not ripped them apart. Thankfully, Wanda has helped him rip them to shreds while he watches with equal parts amusement and stress. Stuffing everywhere.

• Wanda is agile and precise like a karate dog & Westley is strong and fast and uses his big ole head as defense like a wrestler with a big dog head.

• I keep singing “come on doggies let’s go potty” to the Barbie Girl Aqua chorus

• Wanda loves bothering Izzabella Martini the cat after she’s eaten because she meows her hot cat food breath in her face like she’s a cat army sergeant getting her crew in line.

• I wouldn’t be here if not for these babies